Thursday, October 9, 2008

yes- well

Thursday 9 October

Today in religion-
Yom Kippur
Day of Atonement - the most solemn day of the Jewish year.
Celebrates Lord Rama's victory over the evil demon Ravana.
Birthday of Guru Ram Das (Nanakshahi calendar)
Guru Ram Das (1534-1581) was the fourth of the Sikh Gurus.

Today in history
Oct 9 1967
After being debriefed by CIA field agent Felix Rodriguez, Che Guevara is executed in a schoolhouse in La Higuera, Bolivia. Guevara had been captured by the Bolivian 2nd Ranger Battalion, which was specifically trained by U.S. Army Special Forces to catch him.
Oct 9 1989
The Hebrew edition of Penthouse magazine is released. Kosher pornography!

Oct 8 1871
The world reacts in shock to hear the news that Catherine O'Leary's cow starts the Chicago Fire, killing 250 and destroying 17,000 buildings. Bad cow.

Oct 9 1951
RKO Pictures asks Marilyn Monroe to wear panties while working.

See- Life is always a little strange...
*sigh* My chronic ennui has forced my hand and today I have rallied the players of Théâtre de le Cornichon (starring the stuffed animals that share the bed with Mr. Moose and myself.) this time for another riveting installation of "Project Plushie"!
This weeks challenge was to create a historically correct ensemble made from things found in the pantry. Ha! Top that Costume Institute!

I am among the judges as aging super model "Heidi Heidi Ho", The Monkey is Famous American Beer magnate and designer "Michael Coors" and The Polie plays the role of Editor at large for Hola Gato magazine "Nina Hagen-Daz".

The remaining five contestants, Sweater girl Polie, The Lamb, Lisa Douglass the Moose, Frank the Dog and Poodella the pink poodle present their work:

First up, Sweater girl Polie with an interesting Pre revolution ca. 1765 French dress (Robe à la française), made entirely of "No Bugs M'Lady" shelf paper and Camellia brand red kidney beans as trim.
Reactions from the judges:

Heidi: "Great use of the materials, very “Dangerous Legumes"!

Michael: "Lacroix meets Becky-home-eckey" (sniffs dismissively and flicks a the butt of a pastel colored European cigarette at it...)

Nina: "Um, I like cheese, did you know that cheese isn't always yellow? The Monkey said so."
A sigh fills the room...
Next up, the Lamb presented a 11th century Russian Costume -from Kiev to be exact- featuring a Novgorod Shuba (coat) made out of Rosemary bread-sticks, organic sprouted wheat Pappardelle pasta and packets of Sans Sucre low fat chocolate mousse mix.
The judges react:

Heidi: "I would love to have seen you take it to the next level, maybe topped off with a dramatic Kokoschnik made out of Cicatelli."

Michael: "Je déteste des CARBS."

Nina: "The monkey said there would be birthday cake...."

Now it's the turn of Lisa Douglass, who presents the judges with a Kimono made entirely out of pastel colored mini marshmallows with the Obi made out of Wild Boar jerky and the Geta, or clogs, made of aluminum Jiffy pop pans.

Heidi: ."Well, kimono actually a rather general term, denoting "clothing". (kiru=to wear, mono=thing) this all seems rather- general.... tasty mind you, but common and generic....But I can see this posed on a moon bridge with the cherry blossoms wafting through the air....Poodella, please stop hissing at Lisa Douglass!"

Michael: "It looks like something Sarah Bernhardt or Eleonora Duse would lounge around in backstage at a theatre in Paris." (pronounces it, "Pah-RHEE" and rolls his eyes dismissively.)

Nina: "Why doesn't the moon have a name? It's just called the moon.... You know what I think? I think we need to call it Princess Luciana Pignatelli, after the Camay soap lady, That's what I think, She was soooo glamorous, I wish I was that glamorous. I like glamour... and cheese... I really like cheese... and birthday cake...The Monkey said there is something called a "Cheese-cake" is that true? Does it taste like cheese? One time, The Monkey, He put a piece of chocolate candy between two pieces of bread and told me that that was how you made cake but I told him that it wasn't really cake, And this other time, I accidentally put chocolate icing on a pan of cornbread that I thought was yellow cake, so boy howdy was I surprised but I ate it all up with my mouth though. then I was like, Ta -Dah!" (Polie/Nina throws both paws up spilling a box of juicy juice and proceeds to sob uncontrollably)

Frank takes the stage next with a Chiton and Peplos from ancient Greece made from cheesecloth with decorative gummyworm trim in a Greek key pattern.

Heidi: "The gummyworm trim is the perfect foil for the simplicity of the cheesecloth... Oh my, I can see the models gummyworm as well."

Michael: "Hmmm, Decorative trim, I suppose you find it amusing..." (Frank snaps, "NO. I find it decorative." Frank farts dismissively.)
Nina: "Did you say cheesecloth? I like cheese, I always have, Why even as a small polie I always liked cheese, this one time we were at a hotel, like a nice one, and Mr. Moose ordered the "Cheese Festival" from room service. The menu said it was a "Celebration of Cheeses from around the World!" I thought that they were going to send up a large plate of cheese with sparklers carried by a French chef with a big mustache accompanied by colorfully costumed girls of all nations rolling enormous wheels of Gruyere and Jarlsberg. I was a little let down when all that arrived was some Kraft slices and a lot of tooth-pics dressed in red cellophane hats. I like hats, I don't have the face for them but some do, toothpicks don't have faces do they? Well anyway they looked good in those cellophane hats I'll tell you that much. The monkey told me one time that our teeth fit in our mouths like pegs, that's why I call them my Peggies, always brush your Peggies I say! "

The final contestant was Poodella who presented a Tudor Gown made from Alseedawi candy wrappers (The famous red dress with stomacher pinned over front lacing one of Jane Seymour by Holbein, 1537) with a gabled headdress with tails down made of TAB 12 pack cartons.
Heidi: It makes your model look a little hip-y, she looks more like a Threedor than a Tudor

Michael: "I like it. Mind you, I only watch "The Tudors" for the beheadings..."

Nina: "I have to poop now..."

After a little shat, the judges confer and the winner is announced!

It's Poodella!
And the loser? It is Lisa Douglass, who presented the judges with a Kimono made entirely out of pastel colored mini marshmallows with the Obi made out of Wild Boar jerky and the Geta or clogs, made of aluminum Jiffy pop pans.

It was no surprise as she was told time and time again "Don't Boar Nina!"
Yes- well...

How about a drinky? Don't try to find me - I am gonna be all Aimee Semple McPherson in Mexico until after the election....

The Gummy Yummy!

2 oz raspberry vodka
2 oz Hpnotiq® liqueur
3 oz Red Bull® energy drink
3 maraschino cherries
1 Gummy worm
Pour Hpnotiq and raspberry vodka. Top with Red Bull gummy worm and cherries.

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zeitgeist, particular friend, perky libertine, animated trickster, iconoclast, rabble-rouser, object of worship, provocateur, capricious damp enchantress, idiosyncratic beloved reptile, whimsical saucy booze hound, bellwether, luminary, stoic, pensive illicit paramour, aloof, engaged, intuitive, curious, perplexing deranged mastermind, passionate, lasciviously adored offspring, amorous, sultry flamboyant charioteer, scholar, scribe, exalted thespian, voracious, considerable chieftain, impaired, cynical colleague, dreamer, procrastinator, loathsome glutton, artist, oppressed peasant, dainty heathen, narcissist, self-loathing...renaissance man