Wednesday, December 17, 2008

gag order


Le Cornichons friends at Oxford have compiled a list of top ten irritating phrases.
Heading the list was the expression 'at the end of the day', which was followed in second place by the phrase 'fairly unique'.
The tautological statement "I personally" made third place – an expression that BBC Radio 4 presenter John Humphreys has described as "the linguistic equivalent of having chips with rice."
Also making the top 10 is the grammatically incorrect "shouldn't of", instead of "shouldn't have".
The phrases appear in a book called Damp Squid, named after the mistake of confusing a squid with a squib, a type of firework.
The researchers who compiled the list monitor the use of phrases in a database called the Oxford University Corpus, which comprises books, papers, magazines, broadcast, the Internet and other sources.
The database alerts them to new words and phrases and can tell them which expressions are disappearing. It also shows how words are being misused.
As well as the above expressions, the book's author Jeremy Butterfield says that many annoyingly over-used expressions actually began as office lingo, such as 24/7 and "synergy".
Other phrases to irritate people are "literally" and "ironically", when they are used out of context.
Mr Butterfield said: "We grow tired of anything that is repeated too often – an anecdote, a joke, a mannerism – and the same seems to happen with some language."
The top ten most irritating phrases:
1 - At the end of the day
2 - Fairly unique
3 - I personally
4 - At this moment in time
5 - With all due respect
6 - Absolutely
7 - It's a nightmare
8 - Shouldn't of
9 - 24/7
10 - It's not rocket science

Now some of mine, If you use them in my presence you will receive a withering glare, have a shoe thrown at you or be forced to listen to my imitation of Ethel Merman singing Snoop Doggs greatest hits.
However, if I use them, trust that they are only being used sardonically.

"Could I get?" taken to mean "May I have?" Most annoying when heard in hotels or restaurants: "Could I get a juice?" The correct answer is "I don't know, could you?
"Mines" as in "That malt liquor is mines!"
"My bad."
"I guess, what I am saying is..."
"From the get-go"
"In the Zone................"
"To be perfectly honest"
"The problem is"
"Even as we speak"
"No problem" or worse, "No prob"
"I made the fatal mistake of....
"Touch base"
"Offline"
"Think out loud"
'et cetera' pronounced 'ek cetera'
"Second guess"
"Good job!" (Americans always say this to animals they are training or children who are performing some idiotic task.)
"You'll have to make the time"
"Diva"
"Per se"
"Go for it"
"Same difference"
"Embiggen"
"Cutting edge"
"Happy holidays!"

Here, have a drink while I adjust my meds..
The ATL Diva
1/4 oz brandy
1/4 oz Cointreau orange liqueur
1/4 oz blackberry brandy
1 dash dry gin
1/2 oz lemon juice
3/4 oz orange juice
Pour the brandy, Cointreau, blackberry brandy, gin, lemon juice and orange juice into a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You forgot the absolute worst (after "absolute worst" itself) and that is "VEGGIES"...God ! If I hear one more American adult use that, I will go ballistic...which is of course yet another over-used phrase. We are doomed.

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