Friday, January 23, 2009

unpremeditated neural misfirings

These are random things written down in a small notebook over the past 12 months:
Dear diary: you suck donkey
Sleeping is like Death but without the commitment
Marduk duck goose
"Scabiosa" is an unfortunate name for a flower
No Jesus No piece Know Cheeses Know Peas Know Jesus No Please
Eating a roqueforty-ouncer, spilling some for my hommies
Ments of the day: atone, base, content, pig and la
It burns when I peer into the abyss
Cyrano Aspergerac
O tempura! O s'mores!
Your kiss is on my list — in what appears to be your handwriting
My other car is running over your honor student for whirled peas
Crossing and re-crossing the Bosphorus in order to eat the things that swim in it
If being overly dramatic is a crime then maybe I should just turn myself in
If loving you is wrong I don't wanna be Frank Lloyd Wright
Celebrating Lush Hashanah
Sines of the day: ur, co and kero
It takes forty muscles to frown, twenty-seven to smile, but none to just shut it
How to explain to someone that the attraction you feel towards them is strictly gravitational?
Today's pressions: re, ex, sup, im and more op
Jap girls in synthesis
Activity idea: die in a fire, then reincarnate as a moth and enjoy the irony
God grant me the strength to destroy the things I can / a spatula to swat the things I can't / and sixty million dollars in tens and twenties and a kitten-just the head-the cute part
Craving one-time-pad thai, the only cryptographically secure noodles.
Ments of the day: atone, base, content, pig and la
Pecunia non olet
Mr. Moose Mr. Mooses Monsieur Moosey Moose (heart heart heart)
Eating a ritalinzed torte
Today's featured pres: monition, ening, ference, tension and hensile
Why is the democratic convention not combined with Burning Man? On Saturday, we set Obama on fire!
Boodella Poodella Anne Marie Claudette
E shortibus tardum
Today's parties: dance, third, sausage and Donner
Camembert and Ernie
Misread an Olympic fencing event title as "men's individual fail"
Today's featured overdrives: maximum, electronic and Bachman-Turner
Zen Koan of the day: how do you get to third base when they're too young to understand baseball?
Enjoying an organ dönor kebab
C is for cookie- that's hardly acceptable for me
"Technically she's a living Vampire"
No oxygen, no sherpas
Quality is job NaN
Supine: the thinking man's prone
McCain has portrait of Joan Crawford for his desktop background
See ya at the see saw Cindy
Baby talk baby talk its a wonder you haven't OD'd
They don't make a stress ball strong enough for the squeezing I need to do
Metamucil is the poo-bombe baby
Today's featured equilibria: punctuated, hydrostatic, and emotional
Craving a bucket of fried tuna of the sky
It is not heresy and I shall not recant- even for a cookie
Rails makes coding hip / no architectural plan / birds fly off with whale
SPOILER ALERT: inevitable death
Touching your perfect body with my mind. Also maybe a little bit the hands
Scraping love barnacles from the hull of my relationship
Gimme those feets
Today's roons: came, ma, octo, c and polt
Whatever does not kill me can only sap at my dwindling strength and muss my coif
Maybe the reason my laptop's motherboard is having so many issues is a withholding fatherboard
Sea kittens=sky puppies=dirt birdies=catfish woman
No thanks I am driving later, and by driving I mean fucking
Only A/C prevents me leaving the planet
When Obama smiles an angel has an orgasm
When life gets you down, just keep telling yourself "It's only a movie, it's only a movie" even if it's a bad remake of another, better cast movie with a huge budget
Doing my best to follow Jesus but I think He's trying to shake me
When life hands you Stanisław Lem, make Stanisław Lemonade
St. Catherine of Alexandria does a wheelie
Double chocolate cream moca vanilla raspberry almond spice cake please- with fresh orange blossoms as decoration- call Versailles if you have to, there is an orangerie in bloom out there somewhere by God, (clap clap) make it so!
Da'ath- hidden sephrith or delicious candy necklace on the Tree of Life

Brain Candy
1 1/2 oz Alize® liqueur
1 oz Malibu® coconut rum
1 part orange juice
1 part pineapple juice
1 splash grenadine syrup
1 splash ginger ale
Shake alcohols and juices. Add to glass with ice. Pour grenadine and ginger ale on top. Garnish with cherry and orange (St. Catherine) wheel.


Pom said...

I'm officially giddy for the day now! Thanks!

L'Orignaux said...

well, at least one mention of cake...I was getting worried

Anonymous said...

i love your blog - it's deranged yet delightful!

Le Cornichon said...

merci beaucoup... (je rougis!)

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zeitgeist, particular friend, perky libertine, animated trickster, iconoclast, rabble-rouser, object of worship, provocateur, capricious damp enchantress, idiosyncratic beloved reptile, whimsical saucy booze hound, bellwether, luminary, stoic, pensive illicit paramour, aloof, engaged, intuitive, curious, perplexing deranged mastermind, passionate, lasciviously adored offspring, amorous, sultry flamboyant charioteer, scholar, scribe, exalted thespian, voracious, considerable chieftain, impaired, cynical colleague, dreamer, procrastinator, loathsome glutton, artist, oppressed peasant, dainty heathen, narcissist, self-loathing...renaissance man